Wish.com Susan Sarandon & Joe
Xtro is about a guy Sam, that apparently goes to another universe? Well he later returns years after and tries to reunite with his family. He is no longer human and possesses powers. He wants to bring his son back with him to whatever planet he went to. Hopefully its the planet Marklar where everything and everyone is named Marklar! Anyway, his wife or I assume ex wife Rachel has moved on and has a new dude Joe. Obviously Joe has an issue with Sam, because dude is moving in on his wish version of Susan Sarandon. Seriously if you took Susan Sarandon, gave her a breast reduction and maybe hit her in the face a couple times you have Bernice Stegers the actress in this. Meanwhile, back in the movie I’m talking about…Sam is trying to get his son to go back with him and shows him what powers he can have. The boy uses the powers to remove any obstacles he has in the way, including the smoking hot babysitter Analise played by Maryam d’Abo (she is actually the cousin of Olivia d’Abo, Kevin’s hot older sister from the Wonder Years, among other things). Now Rachel and Joe have to keep the son on earth and save him from this fate.
The special effects are actually pretty decent for this kind of movie. Hell, when Sam returns as some weird slimey alien being he impregnates some random chick and is born an adult man straight out of her clown hole in gruesome detail! There are so many wtf moments in this movie. The son brings to life some clown toy as a midget in makeup, also theres a panther that has 3 fangs, for reasons of course. The ending is a head scratcher as well, but I’ll let you watch to see what happens.
Xtro is a truly bizarre movie. I’m not sure why they played this first and Rosemary’s Baby last at 11:30pm. This one is fast paced and action packed while the latter movie is a slowburn snoozefest to me. I give Xtro a C. It was really hard to rate this because it kinda blows but it is entertaining at least.
