Blood Lake (1987)
Directed by Tim Boggs
A little over 10 years ago I embarked on a quest to watch as many 80s slasher movies as I possibly could. Now, I continue with that, there are so damn many of these things that I’ll never see all of them in my lifetime, and I’m only 33. With the classics like Halloween and A Nightmare on Elm Street, comes the mediocre like Sorority House Massacre. Along with those you get some diamonds in the rough like The Burning and Just Before Dawn. Blood Lake however, is none of those, it is one of those movies that exists and probably shouldn’t.
What can I say about this movie? Well I can say that it is possibly the worst slasher movie I have ever seen, it’s right up there with Sledgehammer, but at least Sledgehammer was a little creepy. This felt very much like a home movie, hell it was even shot on VHS. It is the most basic damn story ever, group of teenagers goes to a lake house one weekend, killer starts picking them off…lame. It has nothing to help it stand out from all the other garbage.
The special effects are yawntastic and the acting is more wooden than Pinocchio’s dick. The killer? Do you think this would have a good killer? Then you’d be wrong because its just some fat dude with a Billy Jack hat on. Seriously, that’s all the killer is, and you see him in broad daylight numerous times, so he’s even less scary. He slinks around the lake house like a dipshit most of the time. Really the only redeeming value of this movie is taking the time to count the mullets and laugh at the horrible dialogue and that isn’t even enough for me to return to this ever again. The worst part? The ending, the killer looks out across the lake, that has now dried up after filming, why? Who knows, don’t question it or you’ll drive yourself insane.
Slasher completist? I am. That’s the only reason I watched this shit, but say you are too and you can check it out on Tubi, if you must. I can’t grade this higher than an F, its horrible, but not horrible enough to be funny.
